Trauma Relief - Understanding and Coping with Anger

Anger comes from the oain we feel in a specific situation.
- Pain is frustration...or...hurt...or...fear ...or...all three.
- Anger is a 'secondary' emotion...it comes after the pain is felt..
Types of anger:
- Somatizer...holds it in (usually denies or is not aware of it) & has adverse body & health reactions.
- Exolosive...has an outburst of anger (usually to control others).
- Underhanders...passive & won't confront but goes behind someone's back, it consistently late, has affairs with spouse's friends, etc.
- Selfpunisher...usually self critical & negative about self & others.
How to cope:
- Stop & THINK, THINK, THINK, THINK, then THINK!
  - Why am I angry?_______________________________.
  - What do I want to come of this?___________________.
  - How can I get what I want?_______________________.
  - Work the plan:
    - Take time out (45 minuets sometimes to cool down).
    - Tell the other person what I'm feeling.
    - Tell the other person what I want.
    - Ask the other person 'how can we compromise'?
    - Readdressing the issue the next day may be best.